London Underground: Disgruntled commuter redesigns Tube map so South London is as well served as North

Life isn’t fair – it’s one of the simple truths of existing and nothing symbolises that more than the transport options available to South Londoners.

In the fertile North, Londoners can’t move for Underground stations, and getting around is pretty easy.

But in the South it’s less peachy. Due to the makeup of the rock south of the Thames, transport connections are few and far between with most journeys going through the twin terminals of Vauxhall and Clapham Junction.

READ MORE: Viral tweet shows how tough it is trying to travel anywhere in South East London

Nothing shows the clear discrepancy between travel in London better than this odyssey a frustrated Southerner documented earlier in the month.

Chris Mandle, a journalist for New York Magazine, had been attempting to use CityMapper to work out a route from Sydenham to Brixton.

For reasons even he could not comprehend, the app directed him to travel first to London Bridge Station, then take the Jubilee Line to Green Park, before hopping on the Victoria Line, a roundabout journey so confusing Chris joked he’d need a passport to navigate it.

“I simply love travelling in south-east London,” he quipped in the tweet, “I am doing Sydenham to Brixton which apparently is so awkward I should bring a passport lol.”

The struggle it would seem is real, so its no wonder some canny home designers have put together blueprints for a bold new London: a London where the South is more connected than the North.

The unknown designer’s vision is as bold as it is spiteful, for in this utopian plan the South will prosper at the expense of the North, whose services will be stripped back entirely.

In fact, the furthest point back the Northern Line will now stretch is Tottenham Hale, which is odd as the Northern Line doesn’t currently service that station.

It gets even weirder south of the river where in place of the Heathrow loop the designer has thrown in a Dartford one.

Meanwhile the Metropolitan Line stretches down to deepest darkest Tunbridge Wells in Kent.

The new plan would solve a lot of South London’s transport woes – but at what cost?

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